Cricket – as I played it .. part one

In my teenage years, I swore I’d never do this – say that things were better in my days. However, I often find myself back to my cricket playing days. The world of cricket has changed a lot off late. Apart from the good old 5 day test match games, and the 3 day format, and the 50 over one day format; we now have a 20 over format too – and there are so many new rules. With so many different formats of the game nowadays, there is a lot to choose from today. BTW, for my American friends, who don’t understand cricket, it is a “bit” more complicated than Baseball and it has a REAL “world cup” – where, unlike the world-series in US sports, the matches are played between the top 14 teams from various countries of the world.

My earliest memory of the game is from 1969-70, when New Zealand was touring India and was playing a match in Indore, my home town. Medical college Indore had reserved a pavilion there, and my dad took me to see the 3 day game. I remember G.R. Vishwanath scored a century in that match and everyone around me was praising his game. So, I wanted to be like Vishwanath. I admired the running between the wickets and attributed the speed to the leg guards that the batsmen wore.  Those 3 days started a flurry of cricket activities in my neighborhood, and all the kids were playing cricket (there was no TV in those days – we actually got out of the house to play outdoor games with our friends).

Now my neighborhood was a great place for a kid to grow up. It was a large complex that used to be a hotel complex until the 1940s. The owner sold the place to a Bengali family (Deys), and moved to England. The place was right next to the A.B. Road in Manoramaganj and the new owners promptly converted the place into residential homes. There were about 20 families that lived in that complex of single story homes, with asbestos roofs. It was here that I learned my tolerance for all faiths and cultures – there was a Bengali family,  a Parsi family, three Christian families, a Punjabi family, a Muslim family, a Marathi family.,  Almost all families had kids about the same age, and we all got together to play in the evenings or over the weekends. There were family get together and events were celebrated together.  Anyway, that is for another write up.

Back to 1969…after the game with New Zealand ended (read the score card here), all the boys from the neighborhood would gather outside. There was a small yard between my house and that of a neighbor, where all the boys would gather to play the games. Money was always tight in those days for everyone – and no one had the cash to buy bats or balls. So we did the next best thing – we shared and improvised. I remember the time when no one had a tennis, rubber, cork or leather ball to play cricket – so we made one. We took a near-spherical pebble, surrounded it by lot of vase (which was the term for the fiber used to clean cars in the nearby car-truck garage), and then used strips/bands made from the tube of a cycle tire. The bat would often be the “Mogri”, which was used in all houses to clean clothes.  I was enamored by the game, and started playing it with full earnest. In my free time, when others were not playing cricket, I’d play alone. The homes had sloping asbestos roofs in those days, and I’d throw the ball on the roof, stand ready to hit it when it came down and practiced my shots. Other times, I’d put a ball in a sock, and hang it from a wooden rod outside the house and knock the ball around.

My dad saw my interest in the game. He had played for his school and college teams, and probably recognized the spark first. Or perhaps it was just his desire to get me to do things that I liked. So he got me my first cricket bat – a size 4 bat for a tennis ball. I loved it. Then when I was 9 years old, he enrolled me in the summer camp of Maharaja Yeshwantrao Cricket Club (MYCC), which ran the early morning nets in the Jawaharlal Nehru Stadium. The secretary of the club, Mr. Kakirde, was the father of a friend of my father, and kept an eye on me. I’d walk down there from my house – about 1 km away - and play in the nets from 7 AM to 9.30 AM, and then walk back. Sometimes, on my way back I’d stop in the Medical College, where my dad was a professor (a Reader in those days), and have the orderly (Ram Chandra) make me some Chai with condensed milk. I loved condensed milk so much, that I’d often sneak in and eat a few spoons of it from my Dad’s office fridge. He’d get furious when the aid would tell him that they were out of condensed milk, and would scold the aid – until the aid told him “Sir, Deepu Baba was here and he …”. I think he secretly loved that I liked the same things that he did.

In the first year, my coach was Sanjay Jagdale. He was one of the star players for the state Ranji trophy team and was called as Gattu (Hindi slang for Shorty) – event though he was 6’7” in height. He saw me play the first day and made me the captain of the net. It was in one of the net practices there in MYCC, that Major M.M. Jagdale, Sanjay’s dad who was then the Secretary of the State Cricket Board mentioned that he saw a spark and talent in me – enough to see me playing Test matches for India in a few years. The only hassle was that I was about 10 years old and too young to understand what he meant. But, that remark got the attention of a few coaches and I was moved to the nets of senior guys, and started playing with people who were already playing for the district and some for the state. In those days, the district was divided into 5 zones and they would play matches against each other in the MYCC ground. At the age of 11 years, I was assigned to the North Zone and ended up becoming one of their good bowlers.  In that year I made several friends here – guys like Narendra Bagtheria, Manzur Hassan, Bhagwan Das – all of whom played for the MP State Cricket team, and then guys like Amardeep Pathania, Sunil Asawa, Kamaljeet Anand, Raju Patel, Rajesh Khujneri, Salil & Nikhil Saxena, Ashish and Raja Raje -- to name a few.

Around this time, I was in the seventh grade and in the senior school in Daly College. We used to have regular sports on a daily basis and in the cricket season, we groups would play games by dividing the team. One of the first games I remember is with Mr.Arun Lahari as our staff monitor and guys like Pawan Kasliwal, Ravndra Sigh Dhillon and others playing with me.  As is the case in most schools, Daly College also had a nickname for every teacher. Mr. Lahri was called as “Bum”, probably because of the song that went “Bum ba-bum bum, bum Lahri….”… and Pawan would often speak out the nick name loudly on the field – something that Mr. Lahri would hear outside and pretend to get upset. Now that I think of it, I smile at the fun – but back then, it was scary. Anyway, some of the staff members noticed my game and that same year, I was asked to represent my House Cricket team. I remember that in the very first match, Ankur Sarkar and I scored a lot of runs (I think I got a fifty) and helped the team win. Mr. G.L Verma, the house master of Jawahar house, was thrilled. The next year, when I was in my 8^th grade, I was asked to lead my house team. We won the tournament. I was applauded for my leadership, my field placement, my bowling and my batting (I think I scored well in almost all the games). Mr. Verma, called me out in the House meeting and praised me.

In the summer vacation of my 7^th grade, MYCC selected me to be coached by Mr. P.k. Dharmalingam. Prior to that it was mostly my natural game, with some bits of training advice thrown in or what I learned by watching senior players. Dharmalingam actually taught us the basics of cricket – and he liked what he saw in my game.  I learned a lot from him, and Sanjay Jagdale.

In the 8th grade, I was appointed captain of the MYCC team to play against the Malhar Ashram cricket team.  It was a good experience and I learned a lot. That same year, I approached Mr. Salim Khan, the senior master and sports in-charge in Daiy College to set up a match against St. Paul’s. A few of my cousins studied there – and after a bit of convincing, I was allowed to approach St. Paul’s for a game. I rode my cycle to that school, and talked to Mrs. Noronha – this was something that had never been done and so, she was equally surprised. But finally, I was allowed to set up a game against the 8^th grade of St. Paul’s. The teams met for a friendly game on the Bolia Ground of Daly College, and it was a good game. DC won the match, but more importantly, it had given me a good exposure.

In my 9^th grade, I was selected to represent my School Cricket team. Sandeep Parekh was the captain. Daly College is one of the Premier Public Schools in India, modeled on the British System. They used to play Triangular Matches with two other public schools- Mayo College of Ajmer, and Scindia School of Gwalior. The way it worked was – There were three major sports – Field Hockey, Cricket and Soccer. Each school would host one sport in its season.  That year, Daly College hosted the Cricket teams. I wasn’t sure if I’d make it into the first eleven – and was pleasantly surprised that I was chosen.  I still remember the very first ball of that match that was bowled – I was fielding at third man, and the ball flew to me after first bounce. Yadav, the wicket keeper of Mayo was the batsman and went on to score a fifty. I remember the Mayo players very well – Sandu, Yadav and a young guy by the last name of Giri (later I found out that he was the grandson of the former president of India, V.V. Giri). Anyway, the Mayo team was shot out for 184 runs, I took two wickets (Uday Katoch and Buddhiraja), but we lost the game and the Triangulars as we lost the next game to Scindia too. Sandu was the Mayo College Captain and Vivek Singh was the Scindia School Captain. 

In that summer, I was back with Dharmalingam, who was then the national coach.  I learned a lot that year in an indoor camp. I was also being coached by Vasu Gangwani, who was one of the umpires in the Triangular games. He recognized me on the very first day in the nets and made me the captain of the Nets. When the school cricket season started, I was full of confidence. The school team remained the same as the previous year, as we added a new class for the 12^th class. Kinjal Zaveri was the captain. Unfortunately, the team tried to experiment with my position in the batting order – and in one of the earlier games, I was asked to open against a team that had a bowler Manish Sharma, who was also the opening bowler for the State team. Well, that match cost me my confidence, especially after some of my team mates said a few nasty things to me too. Some people felt that my training in MYCC was costing me my game. I felt really low. Then one day, after school, I was talking to Mr. Dharmalingam and he offered to come to Dc and train the guys for a day. Well – it was accepted by Mr. Jagtap and Mr. Salim Khan  and I think the team had a good session with him. That year, I did not play in the Triangulars, which were in Mayo College, Ajmer – I was the 12^th man and we lost to Mayo but won against Scindia. Sandeep Parekh played a remarkable innings against Scindia School. I got some of my confidence back later in the year when we played a friendly game and I scored some much needed runs. One of the memorable games was the inter-house matches between Jawahar and Ashok house – where I took the catch to dismiss Rajib Nadkarni, and helped in tying the game. Jawahar house became the overall house champion that year.

That year in the summers, I was selected to play for the state school team. We traveled to Jaipur to play there. The team captain was Amardeep Pathania and we had folks like Kailash Gupta, Vivek Singh (who was the Scindia School Captain) and Shabbir Ali. We played against UP schools team, which had 4 state level players. I was very impressed with the UP team when I found out that that several players in that team were actually part of the Sports College. Their main job was to be good in the game. They had a player (also a Bhatnagar), who could bowl the “Doosra” – at that time, no one had coined the word Doosra in cricket. On the second day, there was talk that Raj Singh Dungarpur, the National Selector was on the ground. He was from the State of Rajasthan, and was also an Alumnus of my school. UP had piled up a huge score the first day. Their captain and star player Syed Naqvi had scored a century and was still batting. My captain asked me to bowl the first over that day. In my first two overs, fielders like Kailash Gupta and Shabbir dropped catches that were skiers. When the same thing happened in my third over, I heard a shout of “well bowled Bhatnagar” from the Pavilion. I just saw a tall, well-dressed man standing and clapping. He was wearing a dark tie and had a few guys standing with him. Later in the lunch break, the same gentleman came over to meet the players and I was surprised to see my team’s manager running around playing Mr. Goodie all with him. He stopped near me and told me that I was bowling very well and was unlucky not get those guys out. Then he introduced himself as Raj Singh Dungarpur and said he was glad to see someone from his Alma Mater playing for the State Schools. Anyway, I bowled nearly 25 overs and we ended up losing the game to UP – by an innings and a few runs. But, I was glad to have met Raj Singh and his words of encouragement helped me immensely. We met several times after that, and he would always stop by and say hello. Thorough gentleman and a great man!

When my school season started, my coach Mr. Jagtap was happy that I had played for the state schools team, but wasn’t happy that I didn’t get the runs. He wanted me to be a successful batsman too. That year, I was in the 11^th grade. Yogesh Garg became the captain of the school team. We had a new principal in the form of Mr. H.L. Dutta – who had come from Hyderabad Public School. He invited the Hyderabad Public School Team to visit us and play matches with us. We had the Hockey, Cricket, Basketball and Soccer teams visit us in early Aug. Aug was the time when we have Monsoons in India. It is not your average run-of-the-mill rainfall. The cricket ground was a mess and the pitch a dangerous one – totally underprepared.  The ball was flying all over the place. I bowled 15 overs and got 6 wickets for 29 runs. The HPS team was shot out for 150 runs and we thought we had a good chance. Well, we had a very tough time batting on that pitch. DC team was shot out for a paltry 29 runs, with only I scoring 11 runs. It was an embarrassing match – so much so that my friend Khaikalian wrote about it in my autograph book, just to rub it in.

Over the next few months, I established myself as a good all-rounder.  I was playing as the #4 batsman (batting 2 down) and was able to score in 40s and 50s in nearly every game. My confidence was back and I was taking wickets too. We participated in the first ever inter-school tournament in Indore and won that tournament. Just before the final game of that tournament, I remember biking alongside my friend, Yasmin, who was walking to her dance class – and getting stung by bees which were flying around. The funny thing was that not a single Bee stung Yasmin even once, while when I finally reached home, there were bees inside my shirt and I had a lot of stings in my back. I played the game with a lot of anti-histamines in my body. The Triangular that year was in Scindia School, Gwalior. The team was relying on me. Just before we left for Gwalior, we played a practice game against the Indore Colts, which was led by Pathania and had a few Ranji level state players. During that game, I was hit by a superfast delivery by Niranjan Shirke. To make matters worse, I was declared out LBW. Never to argue a call, I walked. It was my lowest score until then in the matches. We lost that game. The team was a bit shaken up. We left for Gwalior 2 days after that match, by bus on a rainy night, working our way through the traffic jam on AB Road, reaching Gwalior about 6 hours later than expected. We were all tired. We were set up to play the next day against Scinidhia School. Until then, we had been choosing the balls made by BDM, but for some reason we ended up choosing balls made by Recorder, which was what was used at the Test Match level, back then. We realized the difference during the game – the seam was different and our bowlers found it difficult to control the pitching. Our throws were perfect, but our fielding was poor – especially in the outfield, which was very rough. We gave a lot of overthrows too, because the ground was smaller. We lost both the games against Mayo and Scindia and were ridiculed. I still remember Mr. Dhir, the coach of Scinidhia School, making fun of Mr. Jagtap – telling him that he had only taught his players how to throw back to the wicket keeper. Poor Mr. Jagtap – he was smiling but I could see that he was very upset too. I made a silent promise to myself that I’d do my best to reverse this trend of losing games. 

 

A few weeks later, we had a practice game against Tata Leather Company. Yogesh Garg, our captain was injured and Rajib Goswami was asked to step up as captain. He was the other pace bowler. However, it was I who managed all field placements and bowling changes. Mr. Jagtap who was the umpire for the game, was very impressed with my control over the game. One of the Old Dalian (that is the term used for Alumni of Daly College) Narendra Singh Bidwal, who was also the captain of the Old Dalian’s team, watched the match from the pavilion. After the game, he gave me one of the best advices I have ever received – he told me to always look for strengths and weaknesses in the players. As a captain, it was my job to recognize the strengths or weaknesses and use them to my team’s benefit. It is something that I have never forgotten and still use it for my team’s benefit.

In the official match against the Old Dalians, I was the Vice Captain officially, while Rajib went out to toss. However, he told me to manage all the things on the field. The Old Dalian team had some star players of yesteryears, including 7 previous captains. We lost the toss and were asked to field first, much to my delight. I knew that the Old Dalian team had senior players who would find it difficult to field after lunch. Anyway, we got them out for 178 runs, with Sachindra Vyas and I doing most of the bowling and Vyas taking 5 wickets. I still remember catching Sandeep Parekh out in deep mid-wicket, and then taking the wicket of Diliip Singh of Banswara – getting him caught in the slips by Yuvraj Singh (Mr. Jagtap had jumped up with glee when Dilip was out, as he could be a match turner with his heavy hitting). We were thrilled with our show, but knew that the ODA bowling attack was very strong too. Vinod Narang and Kinjal opened the bowling for them and had 2 wickets in the first two overs. Sunil Gupta was bowled off a slow full toss to Vinod Narang, when he thought that Vinod was bowling him a beamer (I still rib him about that). I walked to the field, as I had most of that year, within the first three overs after having lost 2 quick wickets; I thought to myself that this was it. I was facing players that I had grown up admiring and I had a do my best to win. We lost one more wicket soon when Prakash Menon joined me. To make a long story short, we won the match by 7 wickets. I scored 98 runs and Prakash scored 49 runs - both of remaining unbeaten. I was tired but thrilled. We had won that trophy after nearly 9 years – with the present boys winning it last when Vinod Narang was the captain. Mr. Salim Khan and Mr. Jagtap were thrilled –they came to the dressing room and hugged me. Mr. Khan told me that it was one of the finest knocks he had seen in a long time – that was the highlight of my career, and a remark that I cherish forever. The ODA team members came over and congratulated me. The next day, I was awarded the school colors in the morning assembly.

In the summer vacations of the 11^th grade, I gathered a few friends like Prakash, Sunil, Deepak, Yuvraj and started practicing in the nets at School. I decided against playing in interstate school tournament – against the wishes of the state team’s manager. My reasoning was that 12^th grade was my senior year and I had to perform well in my studies, which had suffered off late due to my passion for cricket – my grades were just sufficient for me to pass the exams, whereas until the 10^th  grade, I was considered as one of the bright students in my class. So I went to my Math teacher Mr. Hashmi, to take some private classes to help me finish the Calculus and Trigonometry portion of the 12^th grade ahead of schedule. He was kind enough to oblige and I spent a couple of hours daily with him, trying to complete the course. It really helped me in the 12^th. Had I played for the state schools that year, I’d have been made the captain of the state team – but it would have taken a lot of time from me. Instead, Prakash went to the state school team that year.

The Cricket Triangular in my senior year was in my school. It was also my 4^th year in the school team and I was appointed the captain. I started the practice for the team with lot of rigorous training - -and a lot of emphasis on getting fit. In the rainy season, we’d run around the school campus on the tar roads, Practice bowling on the roads, practice our throws, and play indoor cricket. Of the 17 players that made the team, nearly 14 were day boarders. We played a lot of matches on Sundays – against local colleges, and clubs. I think in all, we played about 25 matches that season, and I scored over 1200 runs and took close to 90 wickets. Before the draw for the Triangular matches, I was asked if I had a preference to play on the first day and take a rest day before the final game. I declined and instead asked to play the last two days. Mr Salim Khan was surprised and asked me if I was sure – I was. My reasoning was that it would give me a chance to see both the opposing teams play at their best, and look for their strengths and weaknesses. The week before the tournament, Mr Jagtap and I sat down with the final 17 players and gave them some pep talk. I was surprised when he put me in front of the team and asked them if they had anything against me or wanted to play under a different captain or wanted me to do something different. Only Prakash said that he’d like me to control my temper on the field – and I realized that I’d been getting upset with the payers when they weren't performing at their peak. I made a promise to them that I’d not lose my cool on the field ever after that. I think that feedback from Prakash has really helped me in my life and I have attempted to keep my cool whenever things have started going wrong. Ever since, I always step back when things haven’t gone right, and try looking at the bigger picture.

I went to receive the teams as they came over the weekend. Sunil and I rode on his dad’s  Lambretta. I still remember Mr. Salim Khan stopping us and telling us not to ride the scooter. I spent hours and hours going over my plans of making field arrangements and bowling changes. On the first day of the Triangular match, Mayo played against Scindia. I sat with most of players near the sight screen, taking notes and observing every move of the batsmen and bowlers. I actually prepared notes on their strengths and weaknesses. Mayo won against Scindia -- one of their players, Martand, scored a fifty and in typical Mayo style, showed off his exuberance by throwing his gloves in the air. DC was up the next day, against Scindhia school. I only remember that match vaguely - just that we got them out very early and then after a rough start, we went through and won the game with ease. I actually experimented with my bowling attack, even giving Deepak and Sunil a couple of overs to bowl. In the end, I got 3 wickets, Rodney got a couple and Sachindra Vyas was also successful. On the batting side, I was lucky to get some runs, and it gave me some confidence.

We were playing Mayo College in the last match. I spent a sleepless night, tossing and turning – this was what I had prepared for all of the past twelve months. Mayo team was very confident, even though one of their star spinners, Mir,  had to leave to take some exam.  Giri was now their captain, and we had played 4 Triangular against each other. He was a really cocky guy, but I guess that is how all the Mayurians (as the students in Mayo College are/were called) were trained to be. We went out to toss, and before I could take out my coin, he took out a ten paise coin and asked me what I wanted. Now, I had enough experience with a ten paise coin to realize that 75% of the times, it would land as a tail for some weird reason (you may not believe that – but I used to keep flipping one while sitting in my chair) – so I called tail. And, it landed as I called. I took off my cap, and moved my fingers through my hair to signal to my team that I won the toss – and a cheer went through the pavilion. I was amused that people had already learned my signals by then. Sunil and Pradeep ran down to get ready to open, as they knew that I’d opt to bat first. I told Giri that I’d let him know in a few minutes what I’d decide and he seemed rattled. We exchanged the list of first Eleven players. The Umpires were Narendra Bagtheria (who was a top notch left arm spinner in the country and bowled for my State team) and Uday Singh.

As we started the game, the pavilion was filled to capacity with present Dalians, Old Dalians, Staff Members and support staff. Some of the teams that had helped us prepare by playing friendly games, also came to watch the match. As was the norm, we lost Pradeep in the first over and then Yuvraj in the second over to Raja. As I walked out, a very loud cheer went up in the crowd – but I felt nervous. The Mayo players crowded around me and cheered their bowler, Raja. The Very first ball I played was a bouncer, which rose to my chest from good length, and I played it defensively to the covers. Sunil walked to me from the other end and we talked as the field changed. I told him that I’d support him as I got settled in. However, it took me only 3 more deliveries, before I got into run. Before I realized, I was in my 40s and striking the ball well. The Mayo field was scattered and they were looking anxious. At one point, the umpire asked their captain, Giri, to stop wasting time on the field and he complained to me. I had to tell him to relax and get on with the game. Giri, their captain, brought himself on to bowl, and with a packed leg side field, started bowling round the wicket to me. Many of the deliveries would have been called wide by a big margin in today’s cricket, but back then, they were considered valid. Anyway, I remember going for a shot and missing the shot. There was a loud nick, and the ball landed in the keeper’s gloves. I walked even before the umpire said anything – with my score at 48. Sunil on the other end was playing on 15 odd runs, and I told him to take control. As I walked, Giri was heard telling his player that he had been trying to bowl that delivery for a long time - -and I couldn’t help but get upset with myself for not connecting that shot, which deserved to be hit for a four, if not a six. Prakash walked out and I stopped to chat with him – telling him to focus and play the innings of his life. Mr. Salim Khan came down to the dressing room and was furious with me for throwing away my wicket.  He point blank told me that I’d be to blame if we lost the game, for playing that reckless shot. Fortunately, both Sunil and Prakash played well and scores into their 40s. DC team was all out for 170 runs – not a large score, but it was something we could try to defend. 

We started our bowling after a light lunch (I refused to let my players eat a lot –which upset Rodney, who was getting ready to tear into the delicacies that were served), with Kacholia starting from the Junior School end. He was fast, but tended to be erratic – and I wanted to let the Mayo batsmen feel just a bit over confident thinking he was our main bowler. His very first ball was a very short delivery, which surprised the opening batsman, Karul, who managed to hit it towards midwicket. I ran from Mid On to field it – I saved a boundary, but it yielded a couple of runs. The next one was hit directly to me with great force, but I managed to stop it. Rodney started the bowling from the other end, and got us the breakthrough in his 4^th over by getting Raja out. Since each bowler was only allowed to bowl nine overs each, I told him that the next over would be his last, even if he got another wicket. I continued with Kacholia from the other side right upto his 7^th over. I brought myself to bowl from the Staff Quarters end, replacing Rodney. I can still hear the cheer from the crowd. Vijay Agar was sitting with the scorers, and his job was to tell me after each over how many overs that bowler had bowled. I got Karul out leg before on my third delivery. The crowd was ecstatic. Martand (Or Marty) was the next guy to walk in – I had seen him play against Scindia and he had scored a fifty. However, I had also seen that he had a weakness - when he hit the ball towards covers, it would be an uppish stroke and there a good chance to get him caught with some intelligent field placement. I placed Sunil at covers and moved Pradeep in deep Extra cover. Kacholia was replaced in the bowling attack by Sachindra Vyas. I directed Vyas to keep the attack on the offside, and bowl fuller. And Marty took the bait – however, he hit the first two deliveries towards the boundary. It didn’t help that Sunil was slow to react, as the ball raised past him. Kacholia and Prakash came to me and suggested that I put Kacholia in place of Sunil – it was a good suggestion and I followed the advice. Kacholia’s strength was that he was an ace sprinter and had great reflexes. And he caught the very next shot from Martand – just inches from the ground. We were all thrilled, shocked and ecstatic – our ploy had worked. I told the team not to relax and stay on the alert. We were still away from victory. Giri walked out to bat and I asked the team to make sure that we got him out too. My next over was the game changer. Giri was on the non-striker’s end. I bowled to the batsman, who was obviously a junior guy, as he was in awe of Giri. The batsman missed the ball, and it landed in Prakash’s hands. Prakash missed catching it, and the ball fell behind him. Giri thought the ball had gone way behind him, called for a run and ran towards the other end. For a second I thought Prakash was shocked that someone would do that – and as I shouted for him to throw the ball, he picked it up and broke the wickets on the striker’s end. Giri was out – and he walked dejected to the pavilion, cursing himself loudly. When he reached the pavilion, he threw the bat into his team and cursed loudly – drawing an immediate reprimand from Mr. Salim Khan. In my very next over, I ran out another batsman when Matkar threw the ball towards me from square leg – he was placed to field there, as he was a left hander and I thought it would be easier for him to throw balls coming on his left side. We were on a roll – I took 1 wicket, Sachindra took 3 wickets and Anmol took 3 wickets. We got Mayo out under 90 runs, and we won the match. I still remember Kacholia running towards me shouting “Bhattu we did it” and I just stayed calm, smiling ear to ear, but calm. Even back then, I believed in showing less emotions when losing, and even lesser emotions when winning. We all hugged each other, and the team wanted me to lead back. We instead agreed to walk back in one file – with our hands on each other’s shoulders. There were fireworks all around – the support staff was going nuts. We got a standing ovation – and there were celebrations for several days after that. My Principal, Mr. Dutta, came and patted my back as did Mr. Salim Khan. Only my coach, Mr. Jagtap was missing – he had been sitting for the past 3 hours under the score board, watching our every move and guiding us – now he had gone home. I am positive that he had become too emotional to face us. We got to see a different side of him later that night, when the team was invited for an impromptu dinner at the principal’s house. Several of the present boys and girls came over to congratulate me and the team. It was easily one of the best moments of my life – as I wrote to my dad, who was posted in Gwalior then. We had won after nearly 10 years – and it was an awesome feeling. The celebrations lasted for a few months -- Principal's dinners. I treated the team to a grand dinner party at Apsara and a lot more...

We lost the match against the old Dalians that year – I was upset, because I was expecting to win. Pawan Sharma was the only batsman to score 22 runs in that game. It was just a bad performance from us – and as Narendra Baghteria, who was the umpire in the game, explained that it was difficult to get the same peak performance which we showed in the Triangular that year. I won the second College Colors that year and also the best batsman award for the second year running. Jawahar house won the Inter House Cricket matches again -- and as per the tradition that allowed a junior (with a high probability to become the school captain next year) to lead, I asked Prakash to lead the Jawahar House team against Ashok House and Sunil to lead against Vikram House. Matkar was allowed to lead in the final game against Rajendra. I also played one last match that year against a group of Old Dalians and remember coaching Paul Barua on how to bowl with less speed and more accuracy -- he was a good fast bowler, but lacked the accuracy.

Overall - it was a very satisfying year -- something I remember so well even today.

Perfect Storm in Japan

People on the eastern coast of Japan have been working their way through a perfect storm that has hit them on three fronts. First the Earthquake, then the tsunami and now the pending nuclear reactor bust. Just one of these would be enough for ordinary citizens to crack and lose their cool. And that is why I am so impressed with the Japanese – they have lost an undetermined numbers of residents, continue to struggle with the lack of supplies and amenities, are dealing with threats of nuclear radiation – but, there has been no panic. There is concern, and a lot of it, but I don’t see any crazy panic, people running amok or any crazy acts of violence.

Why would I even expect that there would be violence? Let us revisit some of the recent natural disasters in the US, where I have been for the last several years. Among the scenes of homes in ruin and families weeping are included all-too-familiar images of looting, local residents breaking into shops and looting items (not just of daily necessities) out of greed or necessity. We saw these in the recent Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans, in last year's earthquakes in Haiti, the BART crisis in Bay Area and some demonstrations in LA. That was just the mob taking over and people doing their follow-the-sheep act. Those scenes reminded me of the riots in India, when the Prime Minister Ms Indira Gandhi was assassinated – I saw people looting the shops for anything and everything. One guy lifted a TV from a shop, and put in an auto-rickshaw. While he waited for his friend to join him, the auto guy ran away with the TV. So this guy, just went in again and got himself another TV.

But there have been no such scenes reported in Japan, almost a week after a 9.0-magnitude earthquake and the tsunami it triggered, which swept several north eastern towns. I saw news clipping where a 79 year old couple was cleaning their house, which survived the mess with little damage. Their response to the TV crew foxed me – they wanted to go and help other people in the neighborhood. In another scene, there were people lined up outside a store to buy necessities. It was a very long line and the store could only accommodate a certain number – so the man at the gates would close the door after every few entrants, politely bow to the guy in front and ask him to wait for his turn. No one was showing any signs of anger or being upset. The same scene was repeated when the officials were distributing drinking water. The truck ran out of it, and there were still several people standing there. They just waited while the officials got another truck and resumed the supply.  

I am always interested in analyzing why people do what they do. And this behavior by the Japanese got me thinking too. My guess is that is this is a cultural difference between the people in the east and the people in the west. Some Americans are raised thinking they are like a one-man army and guys like Rambo are their heroes. Most people in the eastern part of the world are raised to think that honor is important and to not do anything that will bring the family or individual honor down in the eyes of others. That my friends, is a very fundamental difference in attitude and approach to life. I remember the time, right after Hurricane Katrina, there was a cloud burst in Mumbai, India. Thirty Six inches of rain fell in less than 24 hours – yes, I repeat 36” of rain. If that were to happen in California, it would mean eternal floods here. Life came to a standstill in Mumbai. The lifeline of Mumbai, the local trains and all modes of communications/transport were in shambles. The Indian Navy was called to help and they took over the operations. It took about a week to get things back to normal – but there were no riots, no looting, and people were very civilized.

I think that feeling of self-regulation, belonging to a social network, being responsible towards society is very important. Unless we learn to respect the others, and how others perceive us, we will never learn the importance of behavior. It is in times of adversity that the real face comes out. India is a very diverse country. But watch them go at it when the country is playing cricket, or in a crisis or under attack (note recent siege of Mumbai, Kargil War, the three wars against Pakistan) – and you will realize that the entire country stands as one when needed.  If we were to use this criterion for judging the Japanese, they have scored very high in my books. 

I hope the Japanese can recover soon from the mishap and return to a life of normalcy. God bless them and give them the strength to look at the positives in life, which will help them recover from this catastrophe.

Raising kids -- my own childhood and how I raised mine

Once a month, I meet my peer at work, outside of work. David and I go to a nearby café and talk over a cup of coffee. It is a good icebreaker and gives us an opportunity to catch up on things, and see what is happening in each other’s world. Since he has been in the company longer than I, I seek his advice on things and he is always helping me do the right thing. This week, as we were walking towards Martha’s café, we saw this Chinese kid, who was probably about 10-11 years old, acting like a brat on the street and hitting his mom. David commented that the kid needed a thrashing, and that had it been him as a kid, his mother would not have hesitated in giving it to him --- and a minute later, after a few more tantrums, the kids mom pulled him to the side and berated him in Chinese.  As David and I walked away, we started talking about our own childhood -- his in England and mine in India, and how both of us had received thrashings from our mothers for little things when we were kids. Funnily, both of us said we had never been hit by our dads, and also that we credited our parents for making us who we were today.
 

I mentioned to David that recently, there had been a lot of noise about Amy Chua’s “claim” that Chinese Mothers are superior. She tells in her book how she and other Chinese mothers whip their kids into becoming Math whizzes and musical prodigies. The western media has not taken very nicely to that. In the west, people think that kids need to be handled with, well, kid gloves and corporal punishment is an absolute No No. I have seen instances, where passersby have called the authorities when they see someone yelling at their kids or slapping a kid for throwing a tantrum. I remember a particular one -- where my colleague Lavanya’s hubby had gone with his one year daughter to the local library, and she started throwing a tantrum in the library -- you know, like all kids of that age do.  And of course, the dad -- a typical Indian IT guy from the hot southern parts of India, after failing to keep her quiet, lost his temper and took her in a corner of the library and after yelling at her, tapped her on the back. Uh oh -- sure enough, one of the senior ladies watching that, promptly called up the Child Aid agencies and before he knew it, he was in the dock, with a threat of having his kid taken away from him. I am sure he was in deeper trouble when he landed home and informed his wife Lavanya about it -- but to make a long story short, both Lavanya and he had to take anger management classes. Lavanya was all freaked out when she came to me, and wanted to take a couple of days off from work, to take care of the formalities. Frankly, this one was no one’s concern outside of the immediate family -- but we can talk about that in another blog.

The parents -- whether "Chinese", "Western" or Indian or any other kind -- all come in assorted  varieties, and I do not claim that any method of raising kids is superior to another. Like every coin, there is always another side and there are pros and cons to each. However, I’d like to use this opportunity to reflect on what my childhood was like with my mother and also, on how we did as parents.

When I was growing up, my mother would make me practice my math at all odd hours. She would wake me at 5 AM every day (I repeat every day, rain or shine). We would use the morning hours to revise and practice problems mathematics and science. I wasn’t allowed to use that time to work on my homework -- it was practice time. It was learning the Math tables initially, and then I moved over to Arithmetic and Algebra. Reading prose was never high on the list -- it was always Math and science. And boy, did she have a temper. I can definitely lay claim to being hit by almost anything that she had in her hands -- from slippers, brooms, clothes hanger, and of course her hands. It was tough to believe that the hands that could be surgically precise, could hit so hard. None of my cousins had to go through that rigorous training and I always envied them. My mother never liked me playing sports -- and when I did pick up cricket; she was very upset as she thought it took a very long part of the day from my routine. She had always wanted me to become an engineer, and when I was in my 8th grade, she got me books to prepare for the entrance exams. However, I wanted to become a doctor. It is funny how I ended up being an engineer. Oh but her wish list did not stop there -- we would hear her praying in front of the gods, that she wanted me to do MBA. She never coaxed me to do that -- but was very happy when I announced to the family that I had decided to give the entrance exam for MBA, and even more elated when I joined IMS for MBA. ( I am sure she thanked the gods and went to the temple with some offerings after that). That is the way she has always been -- always trying to learn new things. Even today, at nearly 80 years of age, she goes to art and computer classes.
 

I remember as a kid, Rani Bai, who worked for our neighbor Dr. D. P. Mukerji, would see me studying/practicing and often getting the thrashings I got when I goofed up. One day, she stopped me as I was heading back home and got talking to me. She said I must hate my mother for all the things she made me do -- and was genuinely surprised when I said I didn’t, as I knew she was doing it for my own good. The answer surprised her and I think pleased her too. She later told my mother about this and my mother was thrilled to hear it too. I was treated well at home for a few days and received a lot of goodies -- but that only lasted a few days. All this while, I don’t ever remember my dad ever raising his voice at me, let alone hit me.

My mother was a tough judge and always expected that I’d be the best. There was always comparison with others -- within the family and outside. I remember, once in the fourth grade, I acted in a school drama. I played the role of a bishop who talks to a robber and tries to convince him to act conscientiously. At the end of the play, all the cast members were introduced to the audience and had to say a line from the play. When my turn came I did too. When I reached home that night -- there was no praise for my performance -- but I was told that I took too long to say my line. That was the last time I ever went on stage to participate in a drama -- and had a complex for a very long time. In my teens, I showed signs of rebellion when I disobeyed her a few times. But on the whole, I still remained with the ethics that I had learned. She was transferred to another city, when I was in my 9th grade -- and I ran the house with the little money that was given to me; paying the maids and the gardener, ordering monthly groceries, and continuing my studies rather well. There were no sleep overs permitted; the curfew to get back home was 9 PM with permission and informing my dad about my whereabouts at all time.

My mother had an uncanny knack of always figuring out that the kids had done something wrong. I remember as a kid, my sister and I dreaded taking medicines, especially the large antibiotics which were given to us almost every time we sneezed or coughed a few times. We thought we could fool my mother by throwing them outside the window. Did I mention that the windows had ledges outside and these medicines would fall on the ledge below and of course, my mother would see them -- like WITHIN THE HOUR. Then there was the time when my sister and I were alone, and I was supposed to be babysitting her. I thought I did a good job, until my mother came home and as she was talking up the stairs, she looked at my sister and said she had cut her hair. I was like -- No way, I was with her almost the entire time. But my mother insisted she was right. To make matters worse, my sister denied everything. Then in 15 minutes, my mother came out with a strand of hair -- my sister’s. I still remember the thrashings we both got. And then there was the time, when I thought I’d be smart and not use soap when I took my bath; but to prevent getting caught, just wet the soap. I still don’t know how she did it, but she caught me the first day. I am pretty sure she had some secret device that monitored everything I did.
 

As a dad, I promised myself that I’d never hit my kids. To date, I think I have kept my promise. I have done my best to give my kids’ confidence in what they do and believe in. I have always said to them that they need to be good, but don’t have to be the best in everything they do. The idea is to be all-rounders, enjoy what you do and become better persons. From what I see of my girls, I like to think that my wife and I have done a good job.  My girls attended and organized sleepovers -- in fact, both my wife and I took pride of the fact that my daughters had so many of their friends come home and that the kids felt as much at home in our house, as they did in theirs. They organized dances and events for the Sunday school that they attended. For the graduation party of Sarika, one of Shivangi’s friends, all her friends used our home as a practice pen to try out the skit and the dance moves. The girls played piano -- actually Neha completed 8 years of the MTAC and Shivangi completed 7 years; and both enjoyed it. I often saw them practicing on their own, without really any external force. Both picked up the paint brush and made several sketches -- Shivangi more than Neha. Their artwork was appreciated and both won accolades for it. They joined and led various clubs in their school lives -- with the intention of really helping people, not just scoring points to get admission in college. Sure their grades weren’t always an A, but I have come to realize from my own experience that life is much more than just getting As. The girls played sports too -- both representing their high school in Varsity Tennis. Shivangi was also the captain of her high school team, and also played for her college tennis team.
 

My wife and I have tried our best to respect the individuality of our daughters. Today, it makes us proud to see Shivangi excel in Math at her college, as she heads into Engineering. She drives confidently and handles most of her issues herself. Just this week, she went into a dorm for the first time and fell ill on the very first day. She called me in the evening from the hospital, where she had gone all by herself, taken an appointment, talked to the doctors, taken her medicines and was returning back to her dorm. And this hospital was not on campus. I take pride that we were able to extend positive reinforcements and provided a nurturing environment to our daughters, as well as prepare them for the future by inculcating good work habits and ethics. And they didn’t have to lose sight of their cultural heritage while doing all this.
 

I have always told my kids that they don’t owe us anything. We are only doing what is our dharma -- our duty --  and would like to see them well settled in their lives. Today, both are over 18 years old, and we consider them more as our friends than our kids. But, they know that we are always there for them, to offer advice or any help that we can. We will do our duty till they are married and I will be happy to see them do the same thing for their kids.

As my dad told me once, in the end, it is about how you manage yourself in front of a crowd that really matters. Do you have a good friends’ circle and do you feel comfortable talking to people and do people feel comfortable talking to you? And that your family is together and children have grown up with values. Those were golden words, and I realized how important they were, when people stopped me several months after my Dad passed away, to talk about the impact he had had on their lives. That, my friends, is the biggest A one can get - -biggest success in life; nothing can come even close to it.

To end on a lighter note, I present a video from the Indian comedian Russel Peters, on Asian Parenting. Hope you all get some good laughs from it.

2010 - a year that just buzzed by too fast

To say that 2010 has been a year of lot of changes would be an understatement. As always, like every year, we felt that this year too went by too fast – but then 2010 was really a fast year for us. A lot happened this year – I changed my job after spending nearly 9.5 years with AT&T, we sold our house and bought a new one, our younger daughter left for college, we (both Nandita and I) traveled to several places for business and personal reasons. Above all, we reconnected with a lot of friends from the past, and present – thanks largely to the social sites like Facebook and LinkedIn.

The Kids

We only need to look at our daughters to realize that time really does fly. Shivangi turned 19 years old while Neha turned 18. Wow – they are almost out of their teens. Both have been tremendous help and have turned out to be very good kids. We are always thankful that we have been part of their lives and that they have turned out to be good, responsible kids.
Shivangi is now a sophomore at Mills College, as part of her three year dual degree program. She completes her BA in Math from Mills in 2012 and will go to USC, to complete her Industrial Engineering in another 2 years. She has gained a lot of confidence and enhanced leadership skills. She traveled, all by herself, to Florida & Oregon, to attend conferences for the shakha related activities – which she continues to be greatly involved in. She also manages the planning for the local chapter of the shakha in San Ramon.

Niharika or Neha, as we call her, turns 18 on the last day of the year. She graduated from California High School and decided to join St. Mary’s college. She will major in Bio-chemistry. She also continues to be involved in the local shakha and helps in planning activities. We see a lot of changes in her, with just six months of college dorm experience. She has gained a lot of confidence and now has opinions and contributions to all our conversations. She still continues to be the baby of the family though 

Nandita and I

Nandita and I celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary this year. Considering that we are both 46 years old, we have been married for half our lives so far. We have come a long way since 1981, when we first met over the dissection of a frog. (You can read about that here). It still feels like it was only yesterday that I met her and it has been a great ride - I’d do it again in a flash, if I had to.

2010 completes our 10th year in the US and in San Ramon. Life has been good to us here and we are thankful for it every day. In July, we sold the house, in which we had stayed for seven years and bought another one in August. For a short period of three weeks, we had to rent a house – and we’d discourage all our friends to from attempting a move twice in a period of 4 weeks. The new house is great, we have great neighbors here too and we love it. The house is almost an empty nest, as Shivangi too will leave for the dorm in 2011, but we are getting used to it and starting to plan for our life after the kids move out. We can see a lot of travel, reading, pursuing old hobbies in the next several years.

Our jobs

I worked for AT&T as a Technical Director until Mar of 2010 – and that was a good nine and a half years. I loved my job and my team there. However, one of my previous bosses asked if I was interested to work for her again. It is not very often that you get to work with a person you respect, you enjoy working and, with whom, can be on the same mental frequency. It took me some time to figure out that it was worth the risk and today, I am glad that I decided to switch to the Bank Of America. I work there in the eCommerce team as a Sr. VP and am responsible for the delivery of projects. Simply put – I love my job and my team.

Nandita has continued to work as a Director in the Clinical and Technical Affairs at Coagusense. It is a small startup company, based in Fremont and is just getting the product established. The company’s product was approved by FDA and the future looks bright as orders have started coming in.

The travels

In Jan, we returned from a three week long India trip that we took with our friends, Sue and Rory. It was a fun trip and we loved every day there. It was good to reconnect with old friends and visit new places. There is always a lot to see in India. I revisited India in July, though for an official trip. It was a hectic 5 day trip, and I covered Hyderabad and Chennai in those 5 days. I also traveled to Charlotte, NC (about 6 times) and Evergreen (Colorado) on official trips.

Nandita traveled to New York, New Jersey, Princeton, Philadelphia, Washington DC, Chicago, Detroit, Indiana, and San Diego on business trips. Her trips are shorter and more for trials or training of a new customer. She also traveled with Neha to visit Drexel University in Philadelphia, and they visited a few other towns in the neighborhood. She also made a two week trip to India, to visit her mother and brother during their health crisis – both are doing better now.

Shivangi attended a Shakha Yuva Varga (Youth conference) for the West Coast in Oregon and also a national one in Florida. Neha traveled to Philadelphia, to see Drexel University, where she had been accepted, and also visited New York, New Jersey, and Princeton.
We took a short family vacation to San Diego in the last few days of the year.

Activities

We did a lot of things – but nothing beats the concert that Nandita and I attended. It was Paul McCartney’s concert in AT&T Park in San Francisco, where he performed after nearly 40 years. I had wanted to watch him perform since I was 18 years old – and we finally got the chance to do that on the 9th of July, the day after I returned from a very hectic India trip. But, the jet lag vanished when he came on the stage and we sang and danced to all the 45+ songs he sang in a three hour concert - definitely one of the highlights of the year for us.

Nandita participated in the Ekal Marathon – she and her group of friends practiced every Saturday for several months to complete the 13 miles half marathon to support the Ekal Vidyalaya in India. Unfortunately, at the last minute she had to leave for India, to attend to her mother’s health – but thanks to all our friends, she was able to contribute towards the cause to support 3 schools this year (they need $365 per school per year).

The whole family (Nandita more than all of us put together) contributed time and effort in the Sewa project – which is a volunteer effort to feed the homeless in Oakland’s People’s park. We sponsored the food on Shivangi’s birthday and will be sponsoring the lunch in the Livermore temple for Neha’s birthday.

Nandita and the girls continue to be very active members of the Hindu Shakha in San Ramon and Bay area.

I have been very actively involved with the organization GITPRO (Global Indian Technical Professional) chapter in Contra Costa. We had a few meetings his year and plan to have regular monthly meetings in 2011. The intent of the group is to bring together the Indian Technical professionals and guide them to work together to build a solid network across the world. It is a nice group with no political and no religious affiliations/aspirations and only aspires to help Indian Technical professionals.

On the extended family front, things are ok. Nandita’s mother fell and broke her shoulder. Her Alzheimer is worsening with age and there are good days and bad. We are learning to take the good days and making the most of them. One of Nandita’s brothers suffered a heart attack and recovered successfully. My mother is doing fine in Indore, and plans to visit us in early 2012 – by the grace of God, she is quite active and passes her time by reading and painting.

Movies we saw
Some mentionable English movies we saw – Iron Man 2, Harry Potter – Deathly Hallows part 1, The A Team, Eclipse – the twilight Saga, Inception, Expendables, Prince of Persia, Despicable Me, Green Zone, Shutter Island, Mega mind, Date Night, Knight and Day, The Bounty Hunter
Hindi Movies – Only some old Hindi movies

Some good Books we readEat Pray and Love, Katha, The winner stands alone,
Leading by questions, Astronomical dating of Mahabharata, Life of Ved Vyas, Strategic Thinking: A Nine Step Approach To Strategy And Leadership For Managers, Our Iceberg is melting, Goal.

Water Harvesting in Indore

The recent spate of floods in India has become a cause for concern for many in the stricken areas. While there are floods in some parts of the country, there are any parts that are facing acute water shortage.

I remember when I was a kid, there was a lot of rainfall (average was 44 inches per annum) and there was never a shortage of water. We would run in the monsoon rains and play. We’d make little paper boats (I got my grandmother to make me some) and watch them float into the flowing water. It was fun activity for all the kids in the neighborhood. I still have photographs that show that the water level in the Khan river was right up to the road level near Navlakha and that lakes like Pipliyapala, Bilawali and Sirpur, were full. So what has gone wrong now, that we are facing such water shortage issues. My personal opinion is that we have ruined the water supply supply system ourselves by the lack of planning and our greed to build and usurp land. Here is why:

About 40 years ago, I remember that the roads in Indore had little “Naalis” on the side. These were like the tiny drains on the side of the roads to drain the access water. These then dumped the water into the creeks (called Naalas) flowing in the city, which eventually met the Khan river or were emptied into the city lakes. Since there was a lot of open land, water would seep into the ground and replenish the underground water. And there were hundreds of thousands of trees, mainly in the catchment areas.

Now we have done away with the Naalis by the roads. The creeks are filled with dirt or are covered by land usurpers and homes have been built on those. Basically, we have cut the capillaries and arteries of the supply system. There are fewer open land slots. As a result, all the rain water is wasted. And of course, there are no trees left in the entire city -- let alone in the catchment areas. Can you imagine, even this year Indore received about 35 inches of rain and there is a short supply? Compare that with places in California or even the village of Anna Hazare, which only get about 7 inches of rain in the entire year, but is totally self sufficient in terms of water.

In California, there is a lot of greenery in the suburbs. The reason is that the government has mandated grey water be harvested and used for watering the grass and plants in the local gardens. Drains collect the rain water from roof tops and from the sides of the road and this is then sent to local creeks. Basically, water is harvested. Anna Hazare has done the same thing in his tiny village in Maharashtra.

It is still not too late. We can recover from this mess that we have created ourselves. All it needs is some collective will power and good leadership.

Shivangi -- grown up and in college

This one is something that was started by my wife, Nandita, and I have added a few lines.

My elder daughter, Shivangi, started college this week.

It has made me realize how time flies. It makes me realize how limited that duration is, when we have our children to ourselves. Soon all we're left with is all those mental vignettes and snapshots of events...I feel proud to see her blossoming into a confident young woman. Of course there will be celebrations of achievements and culminations of years of hard work - but, I'd always think of her as my little daughter.

I remember the day she was born, about eighteen years ago. We were all crowded around the doors of the Operation Room in Greater Kailash Nursing Home in Indore. After a long night of pains, my wife and I finally came to the hospital. Dr. Ahilya Mukherji was the doctor and Nandita's childhood friend, Anjali, was the assistant. After several hours of wait, they finally decided to take her in the OR to do a C-section, as the baby was getting under stress. I remember the way my father-in-law sat in a corner in the room and prayed, my dad talked to other doctors in the hospital and I paced around the floor outside the OR. At about 7.20 PM, Anjali came out and announced that every thing was ok and we had a baby girl. My first question was about my wife's health and then I went in to see my wife and my baby. There she was -- all wrapped in a bundle, quiet and sleeping. I picked her up gently and clumsily and gently kissed her forehead.

I remember the anxiety when on the third day, I came to the hospital to find her with tubes and under UV light. But it was a minor hiccup. We brought her home soon and things became a blur of activities. As my wife and I had decided, the first child was to be named with the letter S and we chose the name Shivangi - after the name of Lord Shiva, based on a dream I had had (that is a write up for another blog). Shivangi soon became the hub of all activity. She demanded attention and wouldn't let me talk to anyone if she was in the room -- whether she was eating, or drinking milk from her bottle. She'd make this weird grunting noises when I started to say something to anyone else in the room. I also can't forget the countless nights I spent walking in my room with her in my arms, in the middle of the night, so that she could get some sleep. She was adored by one and all -- and was the apple of my dad's eyes. I could sense the attachment in both their eyes when they spent the time together -- so much so that for a long time, Shivangi claimed him as only her grand-dad and Neha, my younger daughter, called him as Didi's (elder sister) grand dad.

She was smart, sensitive and perceptive even as a baby. I clearly remember her first day at the informal pre-school/Day Care behind my house, where she was the only child who was crying when it was time to come home. Then she started a formal pre-school by the name of Mini Land and once again, she frolicked in without a backward glance at us. Her eagerness to go to school persisted next year when she went to Mini Heights where she continued to amaze us with her brilliance. I also remember, that she went to give her interview for the elite private school for Kindergarten. I was so apprehensive when they took her away in a different room, but she just skipped in to match the teacher's step. When they had finished testing her reading/writing and recognition skills and it was time for her to leave, she was adamant that she had not tried all the stations they had set up. We were told that we could just pay the fees at the office and not wait for the final selection list to be posted.

I believe her endearing nature made her the teacher’s pet. She excelled at everything, sports, arts, singing, studies and making friends. I also remember the time we were called by one of her teachers and told that we should not teach her ahead as she gets bored and sits staring out of the window, chair turned back to the blackboard. When we were skeptical of what she could do, the teacher asked Shivangi to write on the blackboard and she promptly did that , explaining as she did that this was so simple. The day that she boarded the school bus for the first time, is still clearly embedded in my memory. My wife stood there, visibly upset, but Shivangi was beaming as the bus conductor took her in and, by the return trip, had made friends with the driver and was already commanding the seat closest to him. She was super excited as she told us about her fantabulous day, and never once said that she missed home. She loved to go to school so much so that one day she ran out incompletely dressed and actually went to school like that.

I remember the time she visited the hospital when Neha was born -- all of 15 months old. She was awfully quiet when she walked in the room. She just sat near Nandita, looking at her and then the new baby. But she quickly adapted, and when we brought Neha home, Shivangi would often push Neha's stroller when we went for walks. They have grown up together into great friends, talking care of each other and ready to support each other. Shivangi always showed deep affection for her younger sister, she never showed any sibling jealousy and willing shared most everything. Her academic life has followed the same high achievement trajectory laced liberally with arts, music , sports and friends. Though, she has given up formal piano lessons, but I still hear her play. She has given up tennis lessons but luckily has been selected to play in her College Tennis Team. She has given up art as a subject, but just last week, she spent a long time in making an oil painting that she gifted to her piano teacher. She is now driving herself, compared to the previous modes of walking holding my hand, walking by herself, auto rikshaw, school bus, and sitting in my car. I will no longer see her waiting to be picked up by me, rather she will get out from her car and stride confidently in.

The last 4 years were devoted towards reaching this goal and now that it is here, I have several feeling. There is however, no feeling of loss, 'cause I have not lost anything. I feel thrilled to see her just the way I had dreamed her to have grown, and yet I know that this is just a beginning of a new journey. It is just end of one chapter for now. There is more to come....