2013 – In Hindsight

To say 2013 went by quickly would be the understatement of the year.

With the communication technology so vastly improved, there has been an overdose of social apps. There is little we don’t know about the connected people in our network, and at times we know a bit more than needed. But, as has been my practice over the past few year, here is a summary of what happened in the year around me.

People we lost in 2011

Nelson Mandela was perhaps the biggest news of the year, and though he had been in & out of the hospital with near death experiences, the news still created a feeling of sadness around the world for having lost one of the last great leaders.

Margaret Thatcher was another one that had impressed me with her leadership skills. The Iron Lady, as she was commonly called, had a great stint as the UK PM for nearly 11 years.

I grew up reading the books written by Tom Clancy, and his death in the year was another big loss.

  

Major news events in 2013 that made headlines, and caught my attention:

• Kumbha Mela in Prayag (Allahabad) in India
• Sachin Tendulkar retired from cricket – for me that was probably the last attraction for Indian Cricket.
• Swami Viveknand’s 150^th birth anniversary was celebrated across the globe
• Barrack Obama took the oath to continue as the USA president for the second term.
• Narendra Modi made a lot of headlines in India and emerged as a leading candidate for post of India’s Prime Minister
• Arvind Kejriwal created the AAP (Aam Aadmi Party – Common Man’s party) which swept the ruling Congress Government from power in Delhi. He seems to have a lot of charisma, and if he can remain honest, he will be able to do wonders for the India Politics.
• Obamacare ran into multiple issues – both political and logical (with the launch causing severe performance issues).

 The Kids

Shivangi is now a senior at University of Southern California (USC), majoring in Industrial Systems Engineering. She graduated earlier in 2011 from Mills College with major in Math. In the summers, she interned at Niagara Water bottling company in Ontario, California and wants to pursue a career in Supply Chain Management. She was elected the Vice President of her sorority at USC, and has built a good network for herself.

Neha, turned 21 on the last day of the year. She is now a senior in St. Mary’s college, majoring in Bio-chemistry, and is thinking about a career in medicine, genetics or pharmacology. She has continued to be very involved in the local Hindu chapter of the Hindu Volunteers Group (HSS) and helps in running its daily activities by helping her mother with the efforts in that area. Her 21^st birthday was a fun event – where Nandita had planned a surprise party for her. We had invited some of her friends, Shivangi’s friends and our close family friends over for lunch on the day, while Nandita took her out to get her nails done. It was fun to surprise her. Earlier, over the weekend, Nandita had arranged for a helicopter ride from San Carlos airport to Half Moon Bay – thanks to her friend, Terri Mead.

Both the girls will graduate in May of 2014.

Nandita and I

Nandita and I turned are inching towards our 50s. We have been married for nearly 27 years now, and have known each other a lot longer (since 1981).

We are so pleased and honored to see so many people feel comfortable visiting our humble abode and staying with us. Between April and Dec, I think there was barely a week when there was no friend/family member visiting us or staying at our place. Some of the folks that visited us were Nandita’s Cousin with her family (Rucha’s parents) from Pune; my College Professor Mrs. Sumedha Nashikkar and her husband, Anil (took me nearly 20+ years of convincing to finally get her to come); my college friend Farhan Pettiwala and his wife, Navya; Our childhood friend Sharmila Dey and her daughter; Alicia and Jeff Sandoval; Tanvi Sinha, and my wife’s neice Priyanka and her mother to name a few. It feels like a good to see people feel at home at our place, and we had some fun times with all our visitors. 

Our jobs

I changed my job last year in November, moving from Bank of America to a start up named Tria Beauty. The company makes laser operated bio-medical devices, which are FDA approved to be used for skin care like at-home Laser Hair Removal, Anti-aging and Acne treatments. I had been keen to move into the start-up sector, and this opportunity just happened to come along at the perfect time, just as both the girls were entering their final year of under-grad education. I am currently the head of IT, and am responsible for eCommerce architecture, ERP and IT Infrastructure. When I look back at what I helped the IT team achieve, I can’t help but feel proud of what the team has done this year (we saved the company nearly $1.5M by sheer negotiations and using better & cheaper options).

Nandita has continued to work as a Director in the Clinical and Technical Affairs at Coagusense, the small start-up company based in Fremont. Coagusense continues to do well, and became profitable this year (its 5^th year of existence) – a huge step for it.

The travels

My business trips took me to Palm Springs, in California, Phoenix in Arizona, Indore and Hyderabad in India. I traveled to Los Angeles as well. During my Indore trip, I got to attend the annual events at Daly College, my Alma Mater, after a few decades. It was very nostalgic and brought back some great memories. I also got to meet some very close friends.

Nandita traveled to Seattle on business trips and Indore to help her brother who was ill.

  

Activities

I continued to be very active as the coordinator for the Contra Costa Chapter of Global Indian Technology Professionals (GITPRO). This year, we had 5 monthly events in our chapter that covered various topics like preparing for an interview, planning your career, Financial and Tax Management, Cloud Technology, Innovation, and Legal aspects of starting your own Venture etc. There is a lot planned for this in 2014.

Nandita and Neha continue to spend their weekends with the Shakha work and supporting the Sewa Project, where the volunteers prepare 75 lunch packages to go and feed the homeless in Berkeley’s People’s Park. Nandita also continued to be involved with her writer’s club, where the members (all ladies group) meet once a month on a Friday evening at someone’s home and read the write-ups that they have prepared. She also contributed a weekly column called Diary of NRI to Daink Bhaskar – a local newspaper published from Bhopal in India.

During my recent India trip, I got to spend a week with my mother. It was a good feeling for both of us, especially after her surgical repair of the thigh bone earlier in Jan 2013. She is doing great, by God’s grace and is able to walk about without the walker. I am hoping to be able to bring her to the US soon.

TV shows and Movies we saw

•   Some mentionable English movies we saw – Man of Steel, Star Trek into Darkness, Thor 2, The Wolverine, Hunger Games – catching Fire, Gravity and Oblivion.
• Hindi Movies –some Hindi movies that we saw (and recommend) – Bhaag Milkha Bhaag, Yeh Jawaani hai Diwani, OMG. 
• TV Serials we followed –Covert Affairs, Rizzolli and Isles, Bones, NCIS, Big Bang Theory, The Mentalist, Person Of Interest, Necessary Roughness and Sherlock.

Other happenings – Sachin’s retirement from Cricket and being awarded Bharat Ratna, the highest Civilian award in India. 

Looking forward into 2014 – In the first half of the year, I have plans to travel to San Antonio in Texas, Miami in Florida, Seoul in Korea and London in UK . I am also hoping to take a cruise this year and a vacation to Australia/NewZealand as well as take my daughters for a short vacation trip to India. On my work front, I am getting ready to launch a new eShopping website that we designed and built.  Here is hoping that all these can go very smoothly, as planned. I am looking forward to meeting more of my close friends and family in 2014. Cheers!!

A feeling of success

Back in 2000, when I told my relatives and friends that I planned to move to USA, many of them expressed concerns about taking my daughters with me. “You guys will lose your touch with the Indian culture”, or “forget about the Indian values and ethics” were the most common concerns voiced openly by many of my pals. Of course, they were happy for me and the opportunity I was getting, but they were also concerned how I’d bring up my daughters in the "wild" western world.

To be honest, I was equally concerned too. I had heard quite a few wild tales about the western culture, how people especially teenagers lost out on their culture, values and the like. Indians, like folks from most other countries, only delved on what was presented in the movies. One commonly saw depictions of the “modern” society in the west and how all the depravity of materialism crept in. So, with a lot of apprehension, I landed in the US in Nov. of 2000. I still remember the girls – all of 9 years and 8 years old, shivering in the freezing air of San Francisco, waiting for the airport shuttle to come pick us up at the SFO International terminal. Somehow, I just knew that with the blessings of my elders and the affections of my friends, we’d all be fine.

My american life started with me leaving for work at 6.30 AM, after lighting a lamp in front of the shrine I created at home, and sitting in front of the gods with hands folded, eyes shut, murmuring my prayers and seeking their blessings. I returned home around 6 PM after a long day, working hard to prove myself in this new work place. My wife was a stay at home mom for about 2 years initially. She developed a lot of contacts with other families. There weren’t a lot of Indians in San Ramon back then, so we were lucky to get into a network of Indian families – all thanks to Nandita’s networking capabilities. Then in 2001, we heard about the Hindu Sangam, which was the first attempt to bring the Bay Area Indians together under the Umbrella of Hindu Swayamsewak Sangh (HSS), and they had a massive event planned in Milpitas, with Anup Jalota performing Bhajans. My daughters participated in the Ramayana play, performed by the kids from all over the Bay area. The event got all of us hooked into the local chapter of the Hindu Shakha, called as Chanakya Shakha (Shakha means branch of a tree).

I firmly believe that Shakha has been a huge help in keeping my girls firmly engaged in the activities of the Hindu community and learning about the Indian culture and values. It is free for attendees and they conduct yoga, teach Sanskrit Shlokas, and bring in subject-matter-experts to give discourses called as bouddhik (intelligent discussions). They organize events and get together to celebrate Hindu functions and festivals like Ganesh utsav, Diwali, Sankranti, India’s independence and republic days, Guru Parab (when students felicitate a teacher of their choice), Pongal and many more.  I watched as my wife and daughters got involved in the Shakha by helping plan the events, often taking part in the plays, or skits or just being the compere. They picked up the leadership skills required to control a crowd of 100-200 people. I was impressed when Shivangi, my elder daughter, facilitated a planning meeting with extreme efficiency, zero nonsense and kept nudging the participants to the topic under discussion – something I rarely see in many business meetings. And I was honestly surprised by the genuine interest both girls showed in participating in the Shakha activities. They attended their camps, both mini and the annual Sangh Shiksha Varg with enthusiasm; they built close friendships with kids from other shakhas; and were looked up to as leaders and idols by younger kids.

 

Switch forward to 2012. Shivangi turned twenty one years old in Sept. We wanted to do something for the occasion and the girls surprised my wife and I by wanting us to do a Satya Narayan katha at home. I thought they probably meant that we organize a katha and they’d sit in it on the side as attendees, while my wife and I did the pooja. No sir – they wanted to do it themselves. I wasn’t sure if the priest would consider the girls doing the pooja, so I called my regular priest and asked him about it – to my surprise he agreed to let the girls lead us in the prayer. Another surprise was in store, when both of them dressed up in Saris (see picture above) and sat patiently through the entire prayer ceremony, doing all the rituals with full concentration and dedication. The priest was delighted and said he hadn’t seen that in recent years amongst kids of that age. Needless to say that Nandita and I were thrilled.

Then just last week, Neha – my younger daughter who is studying in Saint Mary's college, a Catholic, Lasallian, liberal arts college, rooted in the life and work of Saint John Baptist de La Salle (founder of the Christian Brothers and the patron saint of teachers) – told me that her class was going to visit the Hindu temple in Livermore. Now, though her major is Biochemistry, one of her subjects is Religions of India, which she wanted to study as she thought it would help her learn more about India. I asked if I could tag along to the temple, and she agreed. So, on a Wednesday evening she and her friend, Heather, stopped by to quickly change into Indian clothes, and off we went to the temple. I promised to stay out of their way and do my own thing while they moved along with their class led by Professor Norris. Along the way to the temple, it was such a pleasure hearing Heather and Neha talk about Gita and Indian religions like Hinduism, Jainism, Buddhism and Islam. Even more pleasant was the way Neha conducted herself in the temple. She was the only Hindu girl in the group of students (probably about 50 kids), and she held her own there by doing everything the way it should be done in a temple. She’d enter the deity’s sanctum with her right foot, touch the feet of the idol, come out and do a parikrama and then apply the holy vermillion to her forehead. I got to see all that from a distance as I sat in a corner meditating. Her professor later told me that he was leading a group of 40 students to a tour of Indian Holy cities in January, including a trip to the Holy Prayag (I was surprised that he used that instead of commonly used Allahabad) Kumbha which happens once every 12 years and draws millions of people.

 

Seeing all this, I think I haven’t done too badly in bringing up my kids. Based on what I have seen during my recent trips to India, I feel people outside India are more Indian than many Indians back in India – who unfortunately tend to copy what the movies depict as the real American life, which is a lot different in reality. In our case, the credit goes to my wife, the volunteers in the Shakhas here (who have worked hard to keep the Hindu culture alive in US) and to our friends here who have kept us grounded to our values and culture.

I like to think I have been successful in one of my goals in life at least. Hopefully, my kids will be successful in their careers and life in general too. And above all, I pray that they become good human beings.