Thursday, August 27, 2009

Shivangi -- grown up and in college





This one is something that was started by my wife, Nandita, and I have added a few lines.


My elder daughter, Shivangi, started college this week.


It has made me realize how time flies. It makes me realize how limited that duration is, when we have our children to ourselves. Soon all we're left with is all those mental vignettes and snapshots of events...I feel proud to see her blossoming into a confident young woman. Of course there will be celebrations of achievements and culminations of years of hard work - but, I'd always think of her as my little daughter.


I remember the day she was born, about eighteen years ago. We were all crowded around the doors of the Operation Room in Greater Kailash Nursing Home in Indore. After a long night of pains, my wife and I finally came to the hospital. Dr. Ahilya Mukherji was the doctor and Nandita's childhood friend, Anjali, was the assistant. After several hours of wait, they finally decided to take her in the OR to do a C-section, as the baby was getting under stress. I remember the way my father-in-law sat in a corner in the room and prayed, my dad talked to other doctors in the hospital and I paced around the floor outside the OR. At about 7.20 PM, Anjali came out and announced that every thing was ok and we had a baby girl. My first question was about my wife's health and then I went in to see my wife and my baby. There she was -- all wrapped in a bundle, quiet and sleeping. I picked her up gently and clumsily and gently kissed her forehead.


I remember the anxiety when on the third day, I came to the hospital to find her with tubes and under UV light. But it was a minor hiccup. We brought her home soon and things became a blur of activities. As my wife and I had decided, the first child was to be named with the letter S and we chose the name Shivangi - after the name of Lord Shiva, based on a dream I had had (that is a write up for another blog). Shivangi soon became the hub of all activity. She demanded attention and wouldn't let me talk to anyone if she was in the room -- whether she was eating, or drinking milk from her bottle. She'd make this weird grunting noises when I started to say something to anyone else in the room. I also can't forget the countless nights I spent walking in my room with her in my arms, in the middle of the night, so that she could get some sleep. She was adored by one and all -- and was the apple of my dad's eyes. I could sense the attachment in both their eyes when they spent the time together -- so much so that for a long time, Shivangi claimed him as only her grand-dad and Neha, my younger daughter, called him as Didi's (elder sister) grand dad.


She was smart, sensitive and perceptive even as a baby. I clearly remember her first day at the informal pre-school/Day Care behind my house, where she was the only child who was crying when it was time to come home. Then she started a formal pre-school by the name of Mini Land and once again, she frolicked in without a backward glance at us. Her eagerness to go to school persisted next year when she went to Mini Heights where she continued to amaze us with her brilliance. I also remember, that she went to give her interview for the elite private school for Kindergarten. I was so apprehensive when they took her away in a different room, but she just skipped in to match the teacher's step. When they had finished testing her reading/writing and recognition skills and it was time for her to leave, she was adamant that she had not tried all the stations they had set up. We were told that we could just pay the fees at the office and not wait for the final selection list to be posted.


I believe her endearing nature made her the teacher’s pet. She excelled at everything, sports, arts, singing, studies and making friends. I also remember the time we were called by one of her teachers and told that we should not teach her ahead as she gets bored and sits staring out of the window, chair turned back to the blackboard. When we were skeptical of what she could do, the teacher asked Shivangi to write on the blackboard and she promptly did that , explaining as she did that this was so simple. The day that she boarded the school bus for the first time, is still clearly embedded in my memory. My wife stood there, visibly upset, but Shivangi was beaming as the bus conductor took her in and, by the return trip, had made friends with the driver and was already commanding the seat closest to him. She was super excited as she told us about her fantabulous day, and never once said that she missed home. She loved to go to school so much so that one day she ran out incompletely dressed and actually went to school like that.


I remember the time she visited the hospital when Neha was born -- all of 15 months old. She was awfully quiet when she walked in the room. She just sat near Nandita, looking at her and then the new baby. But she quickly adapted, and when we brought Neha home, Shivangi would often push Neha's stroller when we went for walks. They have grown up together into great friends, talking care of each other and ready to support each other. Shivangi always showed deep affection for her younger sister, she never showed any sibling jealousy and willing shared most everything. Her academic life has followed the same high achievement trajectory laced liberally with arts, music , sports and friends. Though, she has given up formal piano lessons, but I still hear her play. She has given up tennis lessons but luckily has been selected to play in her College Tennis Team. She has given up art as a subject, but just last week, she spent a long time in making an oil painting that she gifted to her piano teacher. She is now driving herself, compared to the previous modes of walking holding my hand, walking by herself, auto rikshaw, school bus, and sitting in my car. I will no longer see her waiting to be picked up by me, rather she will get out from her car and stride confidently in.


The last 4 years were devoted towards reaching this goal and now that it is here, I have several feeling. There is however, no feeling of loss, 'cause I have not lost anything. I feel thrilled to see her just the way I had dreamed her to have grown, and yet I know that this is just a beginning of a new journey. It is just end of one chapter for now. There is more to come....

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